REVIEW: Lucha Underground Episode 4 (first aired on 11/19/14 on The El Rey Network)

The show opens with flashbacks to how Johnny Mundo and Big Ryck met as well as clips of the luchadores Konnan brought in last week.    Konnan is also shown once again telling Prince Puma to stay away from Johnny Mundo because "His fight is not your fight!"   If this was a soap opera I'd be pretty sure Johnny Mundo was about to get into a car only to have it explode.


Inside the temple a house band is shown and one- who appears to be the singer- has a microphone but isn't singing.    That's an odd time to show him considering this is a taped show.    The commentators almost immediately throw it to the ring.


Sexy Star is in the ring to cut a promo.   The subtitles say she calls Chavo Guerrero Jr. a stupid coward and says next time they meet he better bring a chair because that's the only way he'll ever beat her.  [Chris Brown Says: "Bitches never learn, yo"]   Star goes on to say she will embarass him for what he did to Blue Demon, though I think having a match with Sexy Star will already have Chavo Guerrero Jr. wondering why fighting Hornswoggle in WWE was so bad.    She basically says she plans on avenging everyone and wants to end the Guerrero dynasty.    Vasectamy on a pole match anyone?


This promo was kind of lame in its nature but also just because it's Sexy Star delivering it.   No good can come from any of this because the end result is either a) Chavo Guerrero Jr. wins over a woman or b) Chavo Guerrero Jr. loses to a woman.    Why can't the men just fight the men and the women fight the women?  (And no that is not sexist, it's actually more even and fairly balanced)   And what if Blue Demon takes exception to someone fighting his fights for him?   What, is he supposed to beat up Sexy Star now too?   Why does Blue Demon Jr. need Sexy Star to avenge him anyway?   The whole thing is just headed down the toilet fast and if anyone wants to press the TNA reset button on it next week I will neither complain nor question it.


Hey, look, that promo took us into a match against... not Chavo Jr.   Ivelisse came out walking and talking.    She played the role of the heel but made an interesting point when saying that Sexy Star hides her ugly face under a mask.   How do we know Sexy Star is sexy when she wears a mask?   Are we to believe she is sexy based upon her body because that objectifies women in ways that should not be cheered.     Oh well, hopefully this match won't suck.


Match 1: Sexy Star vs. Ivelisse

Ivelisse has been in both WWE (not the main roster) and TNA.   She was on the season of Tough Enough I didn't watch (Where that Andy dude won who didn't even make it to WWE television for as long as Daniel Puder) and was eliminated by injury, and then spent some time in FCW before it turned into NXT and she faced Paige, Natalya and eventually Tamina.   So those are three NXT matches that might be worth looking into if you care.    She faced Mickie James in TNA and was the first female member of Aces & Eights.   Blah blah blah, she's got a good track record but let's see if she's good or just associated with talent.    She also teamed with Son of Havoc against Chavo Guerrero Jr. and Sexy Star on the second episode of Lucha Underground.   Just to note though, Star pinned Son of Havoc though so a feud could be built nicely between these two here.

There were dueling chants for "Let's go Sexy" and "EE-VUH-LEESE" at one point.   Ivelisse had this cool choke on Star and then she dropped her head onto the mat.   It was only good for a two count and that got Ivelisse upset.   She then started banging Star's head into the mat.   Sexy Star with a quick and rather cheap roll up pin.     This match had the potential to put Ivelisse on the map because she should have gotten the win with the story being that Sexy Star came back too soon, but no, go ahead and undersell the chairshot that you had to have be to the head and continue with booking that makes Vince Russo look like he has logic.


Dario Cueto is shown talking to Drago.   Drago looks like GWAR and Ultimo Dragon had a baby, which I failed to mention last week.  Cueto says that he needs to know what Drago is made of so he will become the first prey of King Cuerno.     So basically as much as they tried to build up Drago last week with Konnan bringing in luchadores with green card issues, we now have learned they were just brought in to be jobbed out to other guys.   Makes sense.



We cut to Pentagon Jr. who is in the ring with a mic for a pre-match promo.   If everyone cuts a promo before their match now it might get tiresome.    Also, this is now the second of Konnan's recruits from last week we saw as we're just missing Fenix, who won the match if I recall.    So Pentagon Jr. cut a promo about how no one in Mexico respects him, not even the other Pentagons (No, seriously) [Buddy the Elf Note: None of the other reindeer liked Rudolph either.] and he'd like to thank Cueto for giving him the respect he deserves.   Ummm, again, didn't he lose last week?  Ah well.   Pentagon Jr. says he will make an example of Fenix and everyone will respect him.    Sure, buddy, sure.    Fenix was introduced and came out next to a decent reaction.



Match 2: Pentagon Jr. vs. Fenix

Matt Striker said this is a match you'll only see in Lucha Underground.   I wonder if Pentagon Jr. was fired from AAA but I'd rather look up stuff about Ivelisse.    This match was high flying, fast paced and full of back and forth action.   Perhaps the best match Lucha Underground has produced so far, but far from the best lucha libre match I have ever seen.  (Which reminds me to google "Vampiro" and "dog collar" again)    Naturally, Fenix picks up the victory and Pentagon Jr. is onto ultimate jobbing status.


A promo video for King Cuerno is shown.    He says lots of opposite things like, "You call me predator.. I call you prey".


Match 3: Drago vs. King Cuerno 

Matt Striker said Drago looks like a cross between a dragon and something out of GWAR.    Glad we're on the same page.   King Cuerno came out wearing a deer head on his own head.   It looks like something a hunter would mount on their wall, and yet this is supposed to be his crown?     Is it too early to submit this gimmick to Wrestle Crap?

Drago got some offense in and Vampiro even called him "Dragon" a few times.   Really, they couldn't edit that out in post production?    Matt Striker spent time comparing Drago to a Japanese wrestler, even The Great Muta which was an odd comparison and point to bring up on a lucha libre show.  ("Screw this lucha libre crap, I'm going to watch Japanese wrestling now.   Thanks, Matt Striker!!")   And in an unexpected turn of events, Drago picks up the clean pinfall over the debuting King Cuerno.     Perhaps this will lead to the end of the deer crown?


Prince Puma is shown working out and Konnan has to remind him not to get involved in the main event tonight because it is not his fight.

Match 4: Big Ryck vs. Johnny Mundo

Big Ryck starts off with no entrance and a cigar in his mouth.   That will definitely hinder his cardio.   This has the feel of John Morrison vs. Ezekial Jackson which is, what, opening match on WWE Main Event level?    Backstage during the match, Prince Puma was getting beat down by Bgi Ryck's thugs.   The duo then came out and cost Johnny Mundo the match as he was about to win it from the top rope.    Johnny Mundo goes through a table and the show is over.


Was this better or worse than the last episode?  I can't tell.    As much as there are bits and pieces brought up from week to week most of this show feels like it's being booked based on the week regardless of what happened before or what might happen next (Meaning you don't need to watch every episode in order to understand what's going on)   Will Lucha Underground ever find its groove?   This is their fourth week and they really have no big moment brewing yet.   From Prince Puma and Johnny Mundo to Sexy Star and Chavo Guerrero Jr. (who was absent this week for whatever reason) there just isn't anything to leave the viewer wanting more.    You want to see Hulk Hogan get his revenge against the evil Roddy Piper.   But that whole idea, which is  backbone of professional wrestling in any country, is just not here.

Beat Me If You Can. Survive. I'm Seriesous. (2014 WWE Survivor Series Predictions)

Survivor Series has only a few matches this year, so I'm really hoping for some more random nonsense to be thrown on during the broadcast.   Clearly some sort of midcard elimination match could be made with Bo Dallas (Wait, is he injured?), Adam Rose, Cesaro, Curtis Axel, Sin Cara, Heath Slater, Titus O'Neil and the other usuals.    Though the five matches planned are full of more than the usual amount of wrestlers, Brock Lesnar, Randy Orton, Sheamus and probably other usuals are all off the card with injuries and other reasons.   So this might actually stay this way somehow.    Is it weird that there might be more divas on here than "superstars"?   Okay, there aren't but the fact that the numbers are so close kind of has me worried.    Onto the predictions and such!


Natalya & Naomi & Emma & Alicia Fox vs. Paige & Cameron & Summer Rae & Layla (Traditional Survivor Series Elimination Match)

If you're wondering why this match is happening you are not alone.   It doesn't even have that "Total Divas" vs. non-Total Divas gimmick we're used to seeing on Raw every other week.     Also, if you put me on the spot I'd say that Alicia Fox was supposed to be on the heel team and maybe Summer Rae or Layla would be on the face side depending upon Paige's mood.  

So let's get the diva fodder out of the way first.   Layla, Summer Rae and Cameron will ultimately leave Paige by herself.    Alicia Fox and Naomi will be eliminated as well, but the two on one advantage of Natalya and Emma vs. Paige will give them the win.     Paige will go off and feud with Emma, which will hopefully bring Emma back in a way that wasn't as awkward as when she was Santino's sister/girlfriend and Natalya will go back by the side of Tyson Kidd.     Besides, Paige needs a feud to build herself back up before going for the Divas Title again, which leads us to...

A.J. Lee (Divas Champion) vs. Nikki Bella (Divas Championship Match)

Rumor has it Mrs. CM Punk is on her way out of the company.   Rumor also has it that I really don't care.   You know, Sara Del Ray is training the divas down in NXT and everyone says how great they are and really though, I just cannot get invested in any of the divas.   Not a single one.   I've seen the NXT matches and I still don't care.     They're all a waste of time because WWE treats them as such.    Should one or two happen to have a meaningful feud and some character development and things could change but right now the divas division in WWE is still lost so whether or not A.J. stays or goes doesn't matter.

In either case, I see A.J. dropping the title simply so we can have Nikki win it and then since Bree will no longer be her servant or whatever (Really, WWE?  A slavery angle?  Whatever) they can feud over it.   When the forces of good triumph (Based on this match i'm assuming Nikki is the evil twin but I really I don't care) and Brie eventually wins the title from Nikki then she can go on to feud with Paige and, yeah, I just wrote WWE's diva plans up until Wrestlemania maybe.   Or next month's PPV depending upon how quickly they wish to move.


Goldust & Stardust (Tag Team Champions) vs. The Usos vs. The Miz & Damien Mizdow vs. Los Matadores (Tag Team Championship Match)

This could have been more effective as a traditional elimination Survivor Series match if they put The Usos with Los Matadores and El Torito and then the tag champs with The Miz, Damien Sandow and Hornswoggle, but who am I to book these things?  (Besides, someone like one of Los Matadores eliminating Goldust could make for a more interesting follow up than this)   So what do we do here?   Will this finally be the year that Goldust and Cody Rhodes get their singles match at Wrestlemania?   Probably not.     But I don't see them keeping the titles here for whatever reason either.    The Usos have little to gain by winning and I don't think WWE is ready to put the titles on Los Matadores either, even though I think it could work on some level.    (I'd actually like to see a team like Los Matadores have the tag titles when The Acension debut on the main roster and feud with them for it)   This only leaves us with hopefully the best option, which is The Miz and Damien Sandow winning the tag team titles, with Miz eventually turning on Sandow as he steals the spotlight from him.


Dean Ambrose vs. Bray Wyatt

When Bray Wyatt first attacked Dean Ambrose everyone was wondering why, but apparently Michael Cole forgot about how The Shield and Wyatt Family used to, you know, not get along too well.     This is a cool match because neither man seems to have anything to lose (Both in a storyline and actual sense) but let's face it, at Survivor Series, this is not going to end well.    No, wait, I mean this is not going to end at all.    This feud will most definitely carry on to next month.   Heck, these two might even eliminate each other in the Royal Rumble.   There are no clear plans for either at Wrestlemania, so why not have this feud somehow extend until then?   Okay, that's really not likely, but until I can come up with a better idea for either of these guys for Wrestlemania, the show must go on!  (They could do something unexpected at Wrestlemania, like an "I Quit" match to make it special)


John Cena / Dolph Ziggler / Big Show / Ryback / Erick Rowan vs. Seth Rollins / Kane / Mark Henry / Rusev / Luke Harper

When this match had The Authority losing their power on the line it was interesting to see what might happen.    Then they added a stipulation, which was first revealed as being Team Cena being fired if they lost.    But now it is more accurately said that if Team Cena loses, the entire team will be fired... except for John Cena.   Could we really see such a dominant reign for The Authority that John Cena loses all of his friends and the bad guys stay in power?   I do like this scenario better than The Authority just disbanding and, well, we need to seemingly keep the heel faction alive until good can triumph over evil at Wrestlemania.

I assume John Cena cannot be fired because he is still the number one contender to face Brock Lesnar, but from now until Wrestlemania we have some planning to do so here's how it can go down.     Ziggler, Show, Ryback and Rowan can all fight for their jobs in whatever ways they want to and maybe they can even have some stipulation where Roman Reigns fights Seth Rollins and if Reigns wins they get their jobs back.    Roman Reigns, now more than ever, needs to be our Superman.

I'm not sure who will eliminate who here, but the idea of it being down to John Cena and Seth Rollins at the end makes perfect sense at it will build to the stress of Cena having to overcome the odds to save his friends' jobs.    This could very easily see the return of Brock Lesnar, F5 and Cena is eliminated.     Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman will align themselves with The Authority.    Roman Reigns will return and run through The Authority before winning the Royal Rumble and we have Reigns/Lesnar at Wrestlemania.  John Cena loses his mojo and soon forgets about it so he ends up in a dream match at Wrestlemania against Hulk Hogan.   The only question is whether or not Seth Rollins cashes in the briefcase at Wrestlemania and ruins Roman Reigns' moment or not.

REVIEW: Lucha Underground Episode 3 (first aired on 11/12/14 on The El Rey Network)

We opened with a recap of The Rise and Fall of Chavo Jr.   Konnan is talking about how he is bringing in some of the best from Mexico but had some issues at the border.   Dario Cueto says he want to take the three best Konnan (and Mexico) has to offer and put them in a match against each other.   Sure, sure, I can understand that.   Konnan agrees because all of the best trios debuted in a singles match against each other.

On a side note, I actually read something last week (I don't remember why) about Lucha Underground on another site and came to find that the general consesus is that Matt Striker is awful on commentary.   I'm going to be listening for that a little bit more tonight, but I feel as if the days of great commentators are gone anyway so I just kind of tune him out.  (NXT has taught me well because I tune out Renee Young like a cancer)

Matt Striker and Vampiro check in on commentary.   They say Blue Demon Jr. is in stable condition after last week's attack by Chavo Guerrero Jr.   They send it to the ring and here comes Dario Cueto.    He cuts a promo saying that too many people were complaining that there wasn't enough lucha in Lucha Underground and he gives the people what they want so he's bringing in more lucha.   He then introduces us to El Mariachi Loco, which I believe loosely translates to "The Crazy Musician".    According to Cueto, he plays a mean trumpet and can wrestle as well.   Cueto says he discovered him in a Mexican restaurant and I'm not sure what Mexican restaurant has lucha libre performed live in it but I want to go to there.    Cueto says that after a match maybe he'll play you a nice little song and the crowd started chanting "Play a song", which got Cueto caught up for a minute there.     Cueto says there is no challenge to big for El Mariachi Loco and thus we bring out the mini wrestler Mascarita Sagrada for our opening contest.

I didn't notice anything too terrible in Striker's commentary though he didn't say much.   He did ask where the rest of the band was when Cueto introduced El Mariachi Loco, but as a former English teacher Striker should no better than to think that name implies plural.    In any case, I feel like Cueto is mocking the viewers by saying we asked for more lucha and so he gives us a character that could- quite possibly- be out of a cartoon show such as "Mucha Lucha".    Has everyone been asking for more lucha?  Because from what I read most people just hate Matt Striker while I wish Sexy Star would just go away.    As an interesting side note to all of this, WWE's current El Torito once was Mascarita Dorada as well as Mascarita Sagrada 2000 in Mexico so take that for what it's worth.

Match 1: El Mariachi Loco vs. Mascarita Sagrada 

Interestingly enough, Matt Striker noted that we live in a society that is "way too uptight" and we should just call this fun.   Funny from a company that had a woman take a chair shot to the head from a man to close last week's episode.   Whatever.   The commentators hyping that this is the only place you'll find action like this is offensive to me and not just because I watch AAA and CMLL.    You can't pull wrestlers from other promotions and not really have any of your own stars established yet (It is only the third week still) and then state that this is the only place to see lucha libre.     After some high flying action, Mascarita Sagrada scored the win with a sort of choke hold the announcers said wore El Mariachi Loco down.    Post match Chavo Jr. came down and beat up Mascarita Sagrada, presumeably because Chavo once had a program with Hornswoggle in WWE.

It was an all right match, but it was not a successful debut for the Crazy Musician.    if this promotion was created just so Chavo Guerrero Jr. could come out and attack everyone post match though I guess that means be okay with watching it week in and week out.    Why not?  Chavo Jr. should get to kick some people in the head.

Back from the break Matt Striker recaps what we just saw.   This goes to a sit down interview between Vampiro and Chavo Guerrero Jr.     Chavo Jr. says he's mad that Blue Demon Jr. is living off of his daddy's name (whoa, pot-kettle) and Vampiro said that Chavo could have killed Blue Demon Jr.  (WHAT?)    Chavo Jr. puts himself over big with words and realistically, this promo could have been so much better if Chavo Jr. just beat down Vampiro and never said a single word.

Chavo Jr. and Konnan run into each other somewhere with poor lighting and Konnan tells Chavo everyone in Mexico knows what he did to Blue Demon Jr. so he better watch his back because they're coming for him.   He actually told Chavo Jr. as well to make like a ghost and disappear.    As Konnan walks away, Chavo Jr. goes face to face with Mil Muertes.   Catrina says some stuff and then licks Chavo's face.   Catrina really needs to stop licking everybody.

Match 2: Ricky Mandel vs. Mil Muertes with Catrina

Ricky Mandel didn't get a televised entrance so you know this will most likely be a squash.    A video is shown for Mil Muertes, narrated by Catrina, about something to do with him being like The Undertaker and then something about an earthquake... blah blah blah.    Ricky Mandel tried to use his speed to his advantage but was quickly overpowered and just plain beat down by Mil Muertes who showed this was a squash.

Johnny Mundo was shown walking down the hall.  He beat up Big Ryck's goons to get into Cueto's office.    He said he wanted a match with Big Ryck and Cueto granted it for him for next week.   Mundo said that when he was done with Big Ryck Cueto would be next.

          After a commercial break, Cueto was shown handing money to Big Ryck and said he would pay him whatever it takes to send Johnny Mundo to the hospital next week.   The way things have been playing out since last week though, maybe Cueto could have just had Chavo Jr. do it for free.

          Matt Striker and Vampiro check in at ringside and a video is shown that Striker calls "An intimate look at Prince Puma".

Match 3: Drago vs. Pentagon Jr. vs. Fenix 

So Drago is from AAA, Pentagon Jr. spent time in AAA so can you guess where Fenix is from?   Good back and forth, fast paced and high flying action from all three men.   Fenix took a huge leap that looked pretty cool.    Ultimatley, Fenix took the pinfall but this was a really well constructed match that you should go out of your way to see.

My biggest problem right now with Lucha Underground is that it seems like we're being introduced to new people every week with very little of the storylines carrying over.   They should have debuted these new guys before the main event so that some form of continuation could have had the last spot, but perhaps that is what's planned for next week so we'll just have to wait and see.

REVIEW: Lucha Underground Episode 2 (first aired 11/5/14 on The El Rey Network)

The show starts with about two minutes of recapping the previous episode and then the opening credits come on... just like "Grey's Anatomy".

In the ring, the men who attacked both Johnny Mundo and Prince Puma to end last week's show are there waiting to talk.   The first says the only name you need to know is Cortez Castro, though he used to be all around the place as Ricky Reyes.   The next guy is dressed like Homicide and B-Boy but looks a little more like Dan Maff.  He says you can call him Cisco and a Google search says he's "Lil Cholo" but I'm not sure what that means so I move on.   The final man, who was smoking but we didn't get any commercials about bubbles, said he is the leader and he is "Big Ryck" (spelled via the Lucha Underground Wikipedia page)   He says Johnny Mundo knows his face because he was Ezekial Jackson in WWE with Johnny (Okay, maybe he didn't outright say that last part) but he said Mundo didn't know why he was here.

Before Big Ryck could go on, Mundo hit the ring and started taking out the two guys who are going to have to work really hard to prove themselves as something other than an LAX ripoff to me.    Mundo manages to fight the two of them off as Big Ryck escapes into the steps, but then Cisco and Castro each grab a chair outside the ring.   Prince Puma comes down and slides into the ring which seems to keep the heels at bay.   This is already weak booking though because a) They said Prince Puma was out there because an enemy of an enemy is a friend, but realistically Mundo and Puma don't have to be friends and both could still go after the $100,000.   Instead, they should have just been selling the fact that Prince Puma also wanted some revenge.   All of this mixed with the fact that two on two might be even, which might be why the heels backed off, but THEY HAD CHAIRS.   Two heels with chairs should still be able to defeat two faces without any.

Dario Cueto comes out and says if these guys want to beat the hell out of each other they can do it officially in a tag team match.   Big Ryck sits on in the steps area, smoking and not really seeming any more interested in this show than a WWE fan is in a TNA event.    Speaking of which, does Big Ryck go down as having the shortest TNA run of anyone ever?   Sadly, he does not, but he was in and out of there rather quickly, wasn't he?


Match 1: Johnny Mundo & Prince Puma vs. Cortez Castro & Cisco (w/ Big Ryck not giving a f---)

Vampiro started the match by saying "We're about to turn things up one hundred million percent".   Why isn't he fighting still??   Mundo and Prince Puma hit a pretty good double kick on Castro for two guys who haven't supposedly tagged together before.    I'm always going to confuse "Prince Puma" with the regular "Puma" who is currently in TNA as Manik.   Anyway, you know who wrestlers do that running low lep type of kick when his opponent is on his knees?   Yeah, Mundo tried that and Castro totally just leaned back and ducked it thus making everyone who has ever been hit by it look stupid.  (It takes more energy to hold yourself up than lean back)   Mundo controlled the offense on Cisco and really the style of Cisco looks outright wreckless.   I'm not going to say anything too severe here, but he looks like someone who is only in the ring because he won a contest.   Seriously, he looks like the type of guy who would say, "Yeah, I'm trained" and then would get in the ring, get hurt (or hurt someone else) and proceed to sue New Jack.   Watching him take bumps is cringe worthy much less trying to hit offensive moves.    Luckily, Castro came back in soon enough.
Vampiro Confession:  He has never been in a bar fight.

Prince Puma gets tagged back into the match but not before Matt Striker can point out Big Ryck smoking on the steps and Vampiro noting it is not a good idea for the youngsters out there looking to get into lucha libre.   Vampiro also talked about how well Cisco and Castro were doing together but I didn't see it.   The match has been very much 1 on 2 with the single face having no trouble taking out both of the heels.    Matt Striker then noted that the $100,000 was off the table because it had been given to Cisco, Castro and Big Ryck, though they understand Big Ryck took most of it.  (He'll show Dixie yet...He'll buy TNA!!)    After some back and forth, some double teaming and near falls, Prince Puma and Johnny Mundo both hit huge top rope moves to get the double pinfall.     At one point, Cisco kicked out of a Johnny Mundo finisher and if he scored a pin here I would have stopped watching right then and there.    I think I'm going to call Cisco "everyone's fat friend" though because that's what he reminds me of most.


Inside some grungy locker room, Konnan explains to Prince Puma that he can't trust Johnny Mundo and Johnny Mundo isn't his friend.  [Overprotective Parent Who Learned Their Lesson's Note: That's just going to make them want to be together more]   Konnan says that Johnny Mundo's fight is not Prince Puma's fight.   Konnan says he is the only one Prince Puma can trust, which has never backfired on anyone.  Ever.


Matt Striker and Vampiro talk of how Blue Demon Jr. was going to be dealt with by Mil Muertes, which throws to a video package on him.   A thousand deaths are coming, but I'm pretty sure one ought to do the trick.


Match 2: Son of Havoc & Ivelisse vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr. & Sexy Star

Matt Striker notes that the men and women are allowed to mix it up.   Vampiro goes off on other promotions that won't let it happen and how it's 2014 so it's okay for a man to punch a woman in the tit.   Based upon the match that Son of Havoc and Sexy Star had last week, this came off like a fart in church.   No one in this really had anything to gain and I have absolutely no interest in any of these characters except for maybe Chavo Guerrero Jr, who I feel was moved down a peg on the roster because of his loss last week.    This booking wreaks of "You lost, now go get lost in this nonsense!"   Sexy Star picked up the pin over Son of Havoc and the world goes on the same as it did before.   Matt Striker said once more "The men can wrestle the women, the women can wrestle the men" and Chris Brown wants to know where he can sign up.


A training vignette is shown for Blue Demon Jr. who is then met by a woman who says she is there on behalf of Mil Muertes... a thousand deaths... blah blah blah.    This is already getting old and the guy once known as Judas Mesias hasn't even debuted yet.

Speaking of feeling the repetition already, we next go into another video of Konnan hyping Prince Puma.   Couldn't he have had a less confusing name though??


Match 3: Blue Demon Jr. vs. Mil Muertes (w/ Catrina)  

No ring entrance for Blue Demon Jr. but Mil Muertes was accompanied by Catrina who was the female that said "a thousand deaths" to Blue Demon Jr. earlier on.    Apparently she was also in WWE briefly as Maxine and then in TNA for an even shorter amount of time.   I recall neither.   (To The Network!)   This was a pretty one sided match with Blue Demon Jr. getting in a little offense and selling the underdog vibe, but he just couldn't overcome the size and strength of Mil Muertes.   One of the commentators said that this match wasn't really lucha libre and was more like a bar brawl and I agree.   This was a lot of fun as a main event and what should be on every show.  

After the match, Chavo Guerrero Jr. came out to make the save when Mil Muertes kept going after Blue Demon Jr.   Guerrero finally turned and hit Demon with a chair to the (protected) head.    Chavo continued beating on Demon even when refs and jobbers came out to try and help.    Apparently Johnny Mundo and Prince Puma had gone home.    Sexy Star, who teamed with Chavo earlier in the night, came out to try and talk some sense into him but as she pleaded he hit her smack in the face with a harsh chairshot.    I've got to admit that as much as I've been against this violence towards women and all of that, I was kind of happy to see Chavo Guerrero Jr. take out Sexy Star because no one who is supposed to be a fan favorite, let alone wears a mask, should have their name be "sexy".


So the format seems to be three matches with the first one opening hot for the crowd, the second one not quite as good and sometimes a chance to do what you might not have had otherwise a chance to do during the commercial breaks (If you're not viewing this with a playback option of some kind) and both shows have both ended with strong beatdowns.   Next week I would just like to see someone stand strong after the show goes off the air who also just happened to win a match.   But, hey, that might just be me.

REVIEW: Lucha Underground Episode 1 (first aired 10/29/14 on the El Rey Network)

The show opened with two masked men fighting in what appeared to be an empty warehouse somewhere.     Get it?  They're underground, like "Fight Club" or something.  I don't know, the idea of lucha libre and being "underground" in that sense doesn't really work.   It's like trying to stage baseball games in your garage.   One of the luchadors said "Come with me" to the other and I swear he was about to say "Come with me if you want to not die" or I've just been watching "The Lego Movie" too much.

A video explains about the Aztec Warriors who built the seven tribes and all of these other things that really don't feel like they have a lot to do with lucha libre and are probably just going to have viewers wondering if they're watching the right show or if this is a documentary on The History Channel.

After the words "lucha libre" are spoken, we get a nice video package about what that means exactly and the talent roster is introduced.    This is another attempt to bring lucha libre to an audience in the United States, sure, but I feel like maybe 95% to 99% of the people watching this already know what lucha libre is.

Dario Cueto is shown dumping a bunch of money in a wrestling ring to help bring lucha libre to the United States.     See, ROH, that's how you get a national television deal!



This opening now has credits, like an actual television series, and up until now the opening has just been so off, but yet it still reminds me of Wrestling Society X so there's that.     Ring announcer Melissa Santos welcomes us to the show and there is a live band playing that I'm pretty sure is not Los Lobos.

Matt Striker and Vampiro check in on commentary and Melissa Santos introduces Dairo Cueto as the host, promoter and owner of Lucha Underground.   We get it, he's the whole McMahon Family wrapped into one giant ball with Dixie Carter.    Striker says he can't get any information on Cueto and asks Vampiro what he knows about him.   I shit you not- Vampiro says that Cueto is not liked because he is Spanish and not Mexican.  :::el eye roll:::


Dairo Cueto opens his promo by saying "My name is Dairo Cueto" and the fact that he doesn't follow that up with "But you already knew that" just proves how much Alberto Del Rio has influenced me.    Cueto says this is a place for people to either kick ass or get their ass kicked.    He says this isn't a place for children to cheer their heroes because this is a temple, "this is my temple".   So now he is apparently also some kind of religious cult leader.  Neat.

In his own version of John Cena's "Hustle, Loyalty, Respect", Cueto says the lucha libre traditions include courage, honor and violence, which he calls his own personal favorite.   The man who looks like Jeff Goldblum then says that whoever impresses him the most will get a signing bonus of $100,000 and he had a briefcase to show off the bills.   Apparently there will not be a "Lucha Underground Champion" and they'll fight for money instead but hey, whatever works for you.    The Spanish (not Mexican) Ted Dibiase then says that whoever impresses him the most will get this money tonight.

Perhaps a poor choice of words, Cueto then says that everyone tonight has the chance to "get rich or die trying".   So, apparently we're going to have in ring deaths tonight and I am in no way excited for that.     Cueto then says that the first match will be between two luchadors who have lucha libre in their blood.   Ew.    Matt Striker chimes in on commentary about how no John Cena fans will be in brightly colored shirts in the crowd tonight.



Match 1: Blue Demon Jr. vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Wasn't Chavo just in TNA or did I dream that?  It seems like whenever you want to go back to that Mexican wrestling heritage you start with Chavo Guerrero Jr. and then add in Blue Demon Jr. for good measure.    Any lucha libre documentary will tell you that this is starting off pretty paint by numbers but there is nothing wrong with that.

This match wasn't really that high flying or fast paced and even though both of these men have "Jr." at the end of their names neither is that young still.    At one point it looked like Blue Demon Jr. was going to dive out of the ring onto Chavo but he hit a baseball slide instead.   This was a slower, methodical match with chain wrestling and only really one high flying move (by Chavo) and if it had more time it could have told a better story.    Blue Demon Jr. missed a top rope finisher but somehow still managed to make Chavo tap out moments later.   Chavo Guerrero Jr. looks quite possibly the best that I have ever seen him in his career, but I do have to applaud the win of Blue Demon Jr. here if only for the handstomp.


Cueto is shown in his office (?) next talking to Konnan.   Cueto says he's happy Konnan decided to work with him, but Konnan basically implied he was just there for the money and he didn't know about all this "working for you shit", in which they bleeped the word "shit".    Konnan says he found a wrestler who is the best and Cueto says he will put him in a match tonight against a man who goes by many names but here, "in my temple", he will be known as Johnny Mundo.    I look forward to seeing his future tag team partner/brother debut, Telly.

Matt Striker checks in on commentary after a commercial break and says that Johnny Mundo will compete for the first time in three years and I'm pretty sure that's not right.  (Maybe on US television, but not overall)   They then set up a package for Konnan's main man, Prince Puma, who I thought was the independent wrestler Puma but apparently is not.     Konnan narrates this video where Prince Puma feels like Rocky Balboa and we go on this history lesson that I really could have done without but it still gives the character some sort of depth and a lot of professional wrestling does lack that these days.



Match 2: Son of Havoc vs. Sexy Star

I do believe that intergender matches aren't really as big of a deal outside of the United States.   It is worth noting though that Son of Havoc appears to be some kind of biker type gimmick (like "Sons of Anarchy") only he has a really long Eric Young/Daniel Bryan beard and a just awful half ski mask look to him.   He is also Matt Cross, aka MDogg20, who has been everywhere from WWE's "Tough Enough" (Stone Cold style) to, you guessed it, Wrestling Society X.

Sexy Star had a video piece and she said she came from abuse and even though the subtitles said she had contemplated suicide I'm fairly certain she said she had contemplated joining TNA and tag teaming with Suicide but then Hulk Hogan turned him into Manik.    This video package wasn't too awful but as much as everyone outside of WWE wants to remind us that the women of WWE are divas and other female wrestlers are not, this song and dance about it is getting just as tired.

This match was about as much of a trainwreck as one might expect.   Son of Havoc got on the mic right away and said he wasn't going to fight a woman so he told Sexy Star to take a count out loss.   She faked the count out, ran back in and was as convincing as she could be in terms of a woman defeating a man in a match yet trying to keep it from Son of Havoc getting in too much offense.    Poor booking is the only way to describe this because for one thing anyone positioned against a woman (as a man) will automatically be the heel because unless this was 1995 ECW I don't see any man ever being cheered for putting his hands on a woman.  (Even that whole angle with Dixie Carter going through a table recently was rehashed yet still tough to watch)  At the same time, Blue Demon Jr. currently has a win over Chavo Guerrero Jr. while Son of Havoc has a win over a woman who is not a multi-generational luchador.   That match just did not need to happen and I wish it never did.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. was shown sulking and Cueto came in to talk to him about his loss.  He said he hoped Chavo would have the first victory in his temple and perhaps put Blue Demon Jr. into retirement once and for all, but instead he tapped out.   Cueto says that now he must bring in a man to finish the job and once he is here and he is unleashed there wll be no stopped him.    My best guess based upon past experiences is that this might be the time for Ricky Banderas, who has been in TNA, WSX and other promotions outside of Mexico, to debut but I can't be certain.   If this show does have spoilers, I don't read them.    This whole segment here though was much better and built up characters more than any of these other packages tonight and especially that lousy second match.



Match 3: Johnny Mundo  vs. Prince Puma 

This match is actually on the official El Rey Network YouTube channel for free to watch so I'm not going to write about it I'll just let you watch it:

Following the match, where the El Rey video cuts off, Cueto tries to give Johnny Mundo the money, then pulls it back.   Mundo and Prince Puma are jumped from behind and we've got ourselves an eventual tag team match down the road.

I actually had to look up the link from when I saw that it was on YouTube and so it took me finding it on the Lucha Underground Facebook page which said that Mil Muertes is coming this Wednesday and, yeah, he's the once Ricky Banderas so I at least guessed that right.   Still, he's a monster that I'm surprised never got a WWE run.

So as much as we're seemingly moving forward in the world of professional wrestling we're also taking as many steps (if not more) backwards.    Two of the matches were well done, the main event being particularly good, and the storytelling with Chavo Guerrero Jr. has been on point so far as well.   In the coming weeks if these problems are worked out and we can get closer to something more like AAA or CMLL and break away from that Wrestling Society X comparison I will be excited.   

Though I am also excited right now because as I searched for Lucha Underground on google I found a link saying Alberto Del Rio will be there next year and if that doesn't help them gain some exposure maybe it's time to also bring out the real Mistico.