The show opened with two masked men fighting in what appeared to be an empty warehouse somewhere. Get it? They're underground, like "Fight Club" or something. I don't know, the idea of lucha libre and being "underground" in that sense doesn't really work. It's like trying to stage baseball games in your garage. One of the luchadors said "Come with me" to the other and I swear he was about to say "Come with me if you want to not die" or I've just been watching "The Lego Movie" too much.
A video explains about the Aztec Warriors who built the seven tribes and all of these other things that really don't feel like they have a lot to do with lucha libre and are probably just going to have viewers wondering if they're watching the right show or if this is a documentary on The History Channel.
After the words "lucha libre" are spoken, we get a nice video package about what that means exactly and the talent roster is introduced. This is another attempt to bring lucha libre to an audience in the United States, sure, but I feel like maybe 95% to 99% of the people watching this already know what lucha libre is.
Dario Cueto is shown dumping a bunch of money in a wrestling ring to help bring lucha libre to the United States. See, ROH, that's how you get a national television deal!
This opening now has credits, like an actual television series, and up until now the opening has just been so off, but yet it still reminds me of Wrestling Society X so there's that. Ring announcer Melissa Santos welcomes us to the show and there is a live band playing that I'm pretty sure is not Los Lobos.
Matt Striker and Vampiro check in on commentary and Melissa Santos introduces Dairo Cueto as the host, promoter and owner of Lucha Underground. We get it, he's the whole McMahon Family wrapped into one giant ball with Dixie Carter. Striker says he can't get any information on Cueto and asks Vampiro what he knows about him. I shit you not- Vampiro says that Cueto is not liked because he is Spanish and not Mexican. :::el eye roll:::
Dairo Cueto opens his promo by saying "My name is Dairo Cueto" and the fact that he doesn't follow that up with "But you already knew that" just proves how much Alberto Del Rio has influenced me. Cueto says this is a place for people to either kick ass or get their ass kicked. He says this isn't a place for children to cheer their heroes because this is a temple, "this is my temple". So now he is apparently also some kind of religious cult leader. Neat.
In his own version of John Cena's "Hustle, Loyalty, Respect", Cueto says the lucha libre traditions include courage, honor and violence, which he calls his own personal favorite. The man who looks like Jeff Goldblum then says that whoever impresses him the most will get a signing bonus of $100,000 and he had a briefcase to show off the bills. Apparently there will not be a "Lucha Underground Champion" and they'll fight for money instead but hey, whatever works for you. The Spanish (not Mexican) Ted Dibiase then says that whoever impresses him the most will get this money tonight.
Perhaps a poor choice of words, Cueto then says that everyone tonight has the chance to "get rich or die trying". So, apparently we're going to have in ring deaths tonight and I am in no way excited for that. Cueto then says that the first match will be between two luchadors who have lucha libre in their blood. Ew. Matt Striker chimes in on commentary about how no John Cena fans will be in brightly colored shirts in the crowd tonight.
Match 1: Blue Demon Jr. vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.
Wasn't Chavo just in TNA or did I dream that? It seems like whenever you want to go back to that Mexican wrestling heritage you start with Chavo Guerrero Jr. and then add in Blue Demon Jr. for good measure. Any lucha libre documentary will tell you that this is starting off pretty paint by numbers but there is nothing wrong with that.
This match wasn't really that high flying or fast paced and even though both of these men have "Jr." at the end of their names neither is that young still. At one point it looked like Blue Demon Jr. was going to dive out of the ring onto Chavo but he hit a baseball slide instead. This was a slower, methodical match with chain wrestling and only really one high flying move (by Chavo) and if it had more time it could have told a better story. Blue Demon Jr. missed a top rope finisher but somehow still managed to make Chavo tap out moments later. Chavo Guerrero Jr. looks quite possibly the best that I have ever seen him in his career, but I do have to applaud the win of Blue Demon Jr. here if only for the handstomp.
Cueto is shown in his office (?) next talking to Konnan. Cueto says he's happy Konnan decided to work with him, but Konnan basically implied he was just there for the money and he didn't know about all this "working for you shit", in which they bleeped the word "shit". Konnan says he found a wrestler who is the best and Cueto says he will put him in a match tonight against a man who goes by many names but here, "in my temple", he will be known as Johnny Mundo. I look forward to seeing his future tag team partner/brother debut, Telly.
Matt Striker checks in on commentary after a commercial break and says that Johnny Mundo will compete for the first time in three years and I'm pretty sure that's not right. (Maybe on US television, but not overall) They then set up a package for Konnan's main man, Prince Puma, who I thought was the independent wrestler Puma but apparently is not. Konnan narrates this video where Prince Puma feels like Rocky Balboa and we go on this history lesson that I really could have done without but it still gives the character some sort of depth and a lot of professional wrestling does lack that these days.
Match 2: Son of Havoc vs. Sexy Star
I do believe that intergender matches aren't really as big of a deal outside of the United States. It is worth noting though that Son of Havoc appears to be some kind of biker type gimmick (like "Sons of Anarchy") only he has a really long Eric Young/Daniel Bryan beard and a just awful half ski mask look to him. He is also Matt Cross, aka MDogg20, who has been everywhere from WWE's "Tough Enough" (Stone Cold style) to, you guessed it, Wrestling Society X.
Sexy Star had a video piece and she said she came from abuse and even though the subtitles said she had contemplated suicide I'm fairly certain she said she had contemplated joining TNA and tag teaming with Suicide but then Hulk Hogan turned him into Manik. This video package wasn't too awful but as much as everyone outside of WWE wants to remind us that the women of WWE are divas and other female wrestlers are not, this song and dance about it is getting just as tired.
This match was about as much of a trainwreck as one might expect. Son of Havoc got on the mic right away and said he wasn't going to fight a woman so he told Sexy Star to take a count out loss. She faked the count out, ran back in and was as convincing as she could be in terms of a woman defeating a man in a match yet trying to keep it from Son of Havoc getting in too much offense. Poor booking is the only way to describe this because for one thing anyone positioned against a woman (as a man) will automatically be the heel because unless this was 1995 ECW I don't see any man ever being cheered for putting his hands on a woman. (Even that whole angle with Dixie Carter going through a table recently was rehashed yet still tough to watch) At the same time, Blue Demon Jr. currently has a win over Chavo Guerrero Jr. while Son of Havoc has a win over a woman who is not a multi-generational luchador. That match just did not need to happen and I wish it never did.
Chavo Guerrero Jr. was shown sulking and Cueto came in to talk to him about his loss. He said he hoped Chavo would have the first victory in his temple and perhaps put Blue Demon Jr. into retirement once and for all, but instead he tapped out. Cueto says that now he must bring in a man to finish the job and once he is here and he is unleashed there wll be no stopped him. My best guess based upon past experiences is that this might be the time for Ricky Banderas, who has been in TNA, WSX and other promotions outside of Mexico, to debut but I can't be certain. If this show does have spoilers, I don't read them. This whole segment here though was much better and built up characters more than any of these other packages tonight and especially that lousy second match.
Match 3: Johnny Mundo vs. Prince Puma
This match is actually on the official El Rey Network YouTube channel for free to watch so I'm not going to write about it I'll just let you watch it:
Following the match, where the El Rey video cuts off, Cueto tries to give Johnny Mundo the money, then pulls it back. Mundo and Prince Puma are jumped from behind and we've got ourselves an eventual tag team match down the road.
I actually had to look up the link from when I saw that it was on YouTube and so it took me finding it on the Lucha Underground Facebook page which said that Mil Muertes is coming this Wednesday and, yeah, he's the once Ricky Banderas so I at least guessed that right. Still, he's a monster that I'm surprised never got a WWE run.
So as much as we're seemingly moving forward in the world of professional wrestling we're also taking as many steps (if not more) backwards. Two of the matches were well done, the main event being particularly good, and the storytelling with Chavo Guerrero Jr. has been on point so far as well. In the coming weeks if these problems are worked out and we can get closer to something more like AAA or CMLL and break away from that Wrestling Society X comparison I will be excited.
Though I am also excited right now because as I searched for Lucha Underground on google I found a link saying Alberto Del Rio will be there next year and if that doesn't help them gain some exposure maybe it's time to also bring out the real Mistico.
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