The show starts with about two minutes of recapping the previous episode and then the opening credits come on... just like "Grey's Anatomy".
In the ring, the men who attacked both Johnny Mundo and Prince Puma to end last week's show are there waiting to talk. The first says the only name you need to know is Cortez Castro, though he used to be all around the place as Ricky Reyes. The next guy is dressed like Homicide and B-Boy but looks a little more like Dan Maff. He says you can call him Cisco and a Google search says he's "Lil Cholo" but I'm not sure what that means so I move on. The final man, who was smoking but we didn't get any commercials about bubbles, said he is the leader and he is "Big Ryck" (spelled via the Lucha Underground Wikipedia page) He says Johnny Mundo knows his face because he was Ezekial Jackson in WWE with Johnny (Okay, maybe he didn't outright say that last part) but he said Mundo didn't know why he was here.
Before Big Ryck could go on, Mundo hit the ring and started taking out the two guys who are going to have to work really hard to prove themselves as something other than an LAX ripoff to me. Mundo manages to fight the two of them off as Big Ryck escapes into the steps, but then Cisco and Castro each grab a chair outside the ring. Prince Puma comes down and slides into the ring which seems to keep the heels at bay. This is already weak booking though because a) They said Prince Puma was out there because an enemy of an enemy is a friend, but realistically Mundo and Puma don't have to be friends and both could still go after the $100,000. Instead, they should have just been selling the fact that Prince Puma also wanted some revenge. All of this mixed with the fact that two on two might be even, which might be why the heels backed off, but THEY HAD CHAIRS. Two heels with chairs should still be able to defeat two faces without any.
Dario Cueto comes out and says if these guys want to beat the hell out of each other they can do it officially in a tag team match. Big Ryck sits on in the steps area, smoking and not really seeming any more interested in this show than a WWE fan is in a TNA event. Speaking of which, does Big Ryck go down as having the shortest TNA run of anyone ever? Sadly, he does not, but he was in and out of there rather quickly, wasn't he?
Match 1: Johnny Mundo & Prince Puma vs. Cortez Castro & Cisco (w/ Big Ryck not giving a f---)
Vampiro started the match by saying "We're about to turn things up one hundred million percent". Why isn't he fighting still?? Mundo and Prince Puma hit a pretty good double kick on Castro for two guys who haven't supposedly tagged together before. I'm always going to confuse "Prince Puma" with the regular "Puma" who is currently in TNA as Manik. Anyway, you know who wrestlers do that running low lep type of kick when his opponent is on his knees? Yeah, Mundo tried that and Castro totally just leaned back and ducked it thus making everyone who has ever been hit by it look stupid. (It takes more energy to hold yourself up than lean back) Mundo controlled the offense on Cisco and really the style of Cisco looks outright wreckless. I'm not going to say anything too severe here, but he looks like someone who is only in the ring because he won a contest. Seriously, he looks like the type of guy who would say, "Yeah, I'm trained" and then would get in the ring, get hurt (or hurt someone else) and proceed to sue New Jack. Watching him take bumps is cringe worthy much less trying to hit offensive moves. Luckily, Castro came back in soon enough.
Vampiro Confession: He has never been in a bar fight.
Prince Puma gets tagged back into the match but not before Matt Striker can point out Big Ryck smoking on the steps and Vampiro noting it is not a good idea for the youngsters out there looking to get into lucha libre. Vampiro also talked about how well Cisco and Castro were doing together but I didn't see it. The match has been very much 1 on 2 with the single face having no trouble taking out both of the heels. Matt Striker then noted that the $100,000 was off the table because it had been given to Cisco, Castro and Big Ryck, though they understand Big Ryck took most of it. (He'll show Dixie yet...He'll buy TNA!!) After some back and forth, some double teaming and near falls, Prince Puma and Johnny Mundo both hit huge top rope moves to get the double pinfall. At one point, Cisco kicked out of a Johnny Mundo finisher and if he scored a pin here I would have stopped watching right then and there. I think I'm going to call Cisco "everyone's fat friend" though because that's what he reminds me of most.
Inside some grungy locker room, Konnan explains to Prince Puma that he can't trust Johnny Mundo and Johnny Mundo isn't his friend. [Overprotective Parent Who Learned Their Lesson's Note: That's just going to make them want to be together more] Konnan says that Johnny Mundo's fight is not Prince Puma's fight. Konnan says he is the only one Prince Puma can trust, which has never backfired on anyone. Ever.
Matt Striker and Vampiro talk of how Blue Demon Jr. was going to be dealt with by Mil Muertes, which throws to a video package on him. A thousand deaths are coming, but I'm pretty sure one ought to do the trick.
Match 2: Son of Havoc & Ivelisse vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr. & Sexy Star
Matt Striker notes that the men and women are allowed to mix it up. Vampiro goes off on other promotions that won't let it happen and how it's 2014 so it's okay for a man to punch a woman in the tit. Based upon the match that Son of Havoc and Sexy Star had last week, this came off like a fart in church. No one in this really had anything to gain and I have absolutely no interest in any of these characters except for maybe Chavo Guerrero Jr, who I feel was moved down a peg on the roster because of his loss last week. This booking wreaks of "You lost, now go get lost in this nonsense!" Sexy Star picked up the pin over Son of Havoc and the world goes on the same as it did before. Matt Striker said once more "The men can wrestle the women, the women can wrestle the men" and Chris Brown wants to know where he can sign up.
A training vignette is shown for Blue Demon Jr. who is then met by a woman who says she is there on behalf of Mil Muertes... a thousand deaths... blah blah blah. This is already getting old and the guy once known as Judas Mesias hasn't even debuted yet.
Speaking of feeling the repetition already, we next go into another video of Konnan hyping Prince Puma. Couldn't he have had a less confusing name though??
Match 3: Blue Demon Jr. vs. Mil Muertes (w/ Catrina)
No ring entrance for Blue Demon Jr. but Mil Muertes was accompanied by Catrina who was the female that said "a thousand deaths" to Blue Demon Jr. earlier on. Apparently she was also in WWE briefly as Maxine and then in TNA for an even shorter amount of time. I recall neither. (To The Network!) This was a pretty one sided match with Blue Demon Jr. getting in a little offense and selling the underdog vibe, but he just couldn't overcome the size and strength of Mil Muertes. One of the commentators said that this match wasn't really lucha libre and was more like a bar brawl and I agree. This was a lot of fun as a main event and what should be on every show.
After the match, Chavo Guerrero Jr. came out to make the save when Mil Muertes kept going after Blue Demon Jr. Guerrero finally turned and hit Demon with a chair to the (protected) head. Chavo continued beating on Demon even when refs and jobbers came out to try and help. Apparently Johnny Mundo and Prince Puma had gone home. Sexy Star, who teamed with Chavo earlier in the night, came out to try and talk some sense into him but as she pleaded he hit her smack in the face with a harsh chairshot. I've got to admit that as much as I've been against this violence towards women and all of that, I was kind of happy to see Chavo Guerrero Jr. take out Sexy Star because no one who is supposed to be a fan favorite, let alone wears a mask, should have their name be "sexy".
So the format seems to be three matches with the first one opening hot for the crowd, the second one not quite as good and sometimes a chance to do what you might not have had otherwise a chance to do during the commercial breaks (If you're not viewing this with a playback option of some kind) and both shows have both ended with strong beatdowns. Next week I would just like to see someone stand strong after the show goes off the air who also just happened to win a match. But, hey, that might just be me.
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