It’s
that time of the year when WWE likes to remind us that Left Eye is dead. If you’re thinking this seems like a
throwaway pay-per-view before the New Year begins (And the road to
Wrestlemania), then you’re probably right.
Although
Alberto Del Rio is being evaluated for a concussion, I still wouldn’t be
surprised to see Sin Cara (aka Hunico) on this card somehow. I also wouldn’t mind seeing the rejuvenated
Brodus Clay either.
Dolph Ziggler vs.
Fandango
This is
the pre-show match, so you know it’s going to be Miz/Kofi levels of
greatness. At one point in time, both of these guys were
heels that fans cheered so they kind of became faces and now who knows what
they are other than buried.
It
really feels like this should be an awesome IC Title level ladder match instead
of just pre-show fodder, but sadly that is the state of WWE right now. Dolph Ziggler needs to move back up the
ranks more than Fandango since the latter really just needs a gimmick overhaul
(Less dance, more wrestle)
Winner: Dolph Ziggler, to send us into the show happy
AJ Lee (Champion) vs.
Natalya (Diva’s Championship Match)
If
there is any justice in the world, Natalya will win the title and have a good
run as champ until Wrestlemania against a returning Trish Stratus, Awesome Kong
(Kharma) or Beth Phoenix. But knowing
WWE, AJ Lee will keep the title somehow and then the women (or at least her, as
champ) won’t even make the Wrestlemania card.
Winner: Natalya, not that it will affect the ratings for
Total Divas
Goldust & Cody
Rhodes (Champions) vs. The Real Americans vs. Curtis Axel & Ryback vs. Big
Show & Rey Mysterio (Tag Team Championship Match)
What
interests me most about this match is the fact that WWE has four tag teams
here, yet there are even more tag teams out there not being used. The Shield and Wyatt Family are both in
handicapped matches, Prime Time Players, The Usos, 3MB, Tons of Funk (if they
instead of breaking up stay together as monster heels) and even that pairing of
Xavier Woods and R-Truth round out what seems to be the best the division has
seen in quite some time. (Also, don’t
forget Hunico and Camacho, when Hunico isn’t playing Sin Cara)
If Cody
Rhodes and Goldust are going to have a match at WMXXX (and why not), then it
should start now with them losing the tag titles, followed by dissension in the
Rumble match itself. That means that
they need to lose the tag titles here, even if through no fault of their own. So let’s break down the competition.
I have
no idea why Big Show and Rey Mysterio are a tag team, other than having
memories of Rey Rey being stuck to a stretcher and Big Show slamming him into a
ring post. If this is setting the stage
for a Big Show-Rey match at WMXXX, then there is no hope for either man here.
I
actually do hope that Curtis Axel and Ryback have a match at WMXXX… on the
pre-show. So with the makeshift tag
teams out of the way, that leaves only The Real Americans as a viable option to
the win titles and rightfully so.
Winners: The Real Americans, because Jack Swagger is a
former World Champion dammit!
Big E Langston
(Champion) vs. Damien Sandow (Intercontinental Title Match)
On one
hand, I remember when Big E was bodyguard to Dolph Ziggler and then Sandow and
Ziggler had a series of match for some reason.
Unless Big E is going to get the true Diesel treatment and win the 2014
Royal Rumble match, I don’t see him dropping the IC title yet.
Additionally,
Damien Sandow has proven time and time again that he can still look good while
losing. I see
no need for a title change here, but hopefully Damien Sandow can get a good
match out of Dolph’s former bodyguard.
Winner: Big E Langston, because WWE likes it big.
C.M. Punk // Daniel Bryan
vs. The Shield // The Wyatt Family (3 on 1 Match)
I’m
actually previewing these together because they are both 3 on 1 matches and so
they share that same quality and a lot to be done with the predictions. On one hand, if either Bryan or Punk should
lose, no one is going to blame them for not being able to overcome the
odds.
In a
similar yet flipped idea, for either team of The Shield or The Wyatts to lose
would be kind of odd because why can’t even the tag team versions of those
factions beat one wrestler?
The
whole deal is highly illogical on paper and could make for some excellent
wrestling, though it doesn’t stand that either man will gain anything
here. (The factions in winning or even the singles competitors by winning)
More
damage will be done to the Wyatts and Shield if they lose than good will be
done to Bryan or Punk, and should either man or both lose… Well, really, this
just feels a lot like no matter who wins or loses it doesn’t matter.
I just
want to see Punk wrestle Ambrose and Rollins.
Let’s hope 2014 is the year that Dean Ambrose wins the MITB and cashes
in successfully.
While
it doesn’t really matter who wins or loses, I’m still going to say that Bryan
succumbs to the odds and loses (Only to bounce back with a Royal Rumble win ala
Shawn Michaels, entering at #1) and Punk will probably win due to The Shield
having some sort of argument.
Winners: C.M. Punk and The Wyatt Family
Randy Orton (WWE Champion) vs. John Cena (World Heavyweight
Champion) (Title Unification Match)
So
here’s the thing. WWE has been pretty
shitty all year and they have their problems, especially with delivering on
promises, so now it’s time for them to step up. This match can be as much of a mess as it
needs to be—overbook it, I could really care less. The only thing that needs to be accomplished
is that Randy Orton needs to come out the winner and Undisputed Champion.
Why? Because we need a heel going into
Wrestlemania XXX. Because we need a foe
for Daniel Bryan and their feud sort of got put on the backburner so let’s
bring it back. Because John Cena will
hopefully find some other way to spend WMXXX.
Yes, I
fully expect Daniel Bryan to be “punished” and forced to enter the Royal Rumble
at spot #1. This would lead to a D-Bry
win ala Shawn Michaels, who then sides with Bryan over The Authority. This will set up the face of WWE Randy Orton
(w/ HHH, Stephanie and Kane) vs. Daniel Bryan (w/ Shawn Michaels and Jose Lothario)
for the title at WMXXX.
When
Daniel Bryan wins the Undisputed title at WMXXX, he can then feud with John
Cena again. But Cena will have bigger
problems, possibly even Brock Lesnar sized problems. I don’t know, I haven’t worked out Cena’s
role at WMXXX yet and I do not want to see a triple threat match.
But I’m
getting ahead of myself.
Winner: Randy Orton because John Cena isn’t friends with HHH
The
next pay-per-view (and first for 2014) is the Royal Rumble and that should be
interesting. The matches aside from a
title match and the Rumble itself always seem to be throwaway, so we’ll see
John Cena vs. Randy Orton again in some capacity, if only to shift their feud
to other people. (I fully expect Orton
to go doing something else while John Cena faces Daniel Bryan at WMXXX) The Rumble match itself also gives a chance
for the real Sin Cara to return as well as Brodus Clay to dump out Tensai.
